Blog Archive

Friday, November 12, 2010

So tired

Life around here hasn't been much fun that is for sure. Endless nights filled with work and days filled with catching up on sleep. That is the story of my life. I get a few hours in the morning online and that's about all. The MIL situation is still there. I haven't forgiven and she hasn't apologized, but is expecting us to still be there to drive her everywhere she needs to go and get her things. And I'm at my wits end with it all. My husband had told me that he would understand if I didn't do anything for her, but is throwing it in my face when I won't. So to keep the peace between he and I, I just bite my tounge. She stated that she is moving on the 20th of this month and hasn't disclosed the location, but that is all fine and dandy with me. I don't care where she moves as long as it is far far away! LOL Is that awful or what? I just hope she doesn't expect any help from me with moving, because that is one thing I will put my foot down on!

Well I'm off to soak in my tub and hit the sheets. Gotta do that whole work thing again tonight! Yay! LOL
Later Taters,

Friday, November 5, 2010

To forgive or not to forgive

Recently I had the undo pleasure of moving my mother-in-law to Ellijay Ga (where my husband and I reside) And to start off with, NO she did not move in with us. Just to make that one very clear from the beginning! LOL

Well we moved her from Columbus, Ga, which is 3 hrs south of Ellijay. No big deal. She gave us a week to find her a place to live, so we did. Keep in mind, she had no money for a deposit and no plans and has 3 tiny yappy dogs and most places around here don't accept pets. So we found her a place that is run by our current "landlord". From the moment we have moved her up here she has been nothing but a pain in my ass. Nothing makes her happy, she is constantly whining about something. She doesn't like the house that we moved her to. Granted it's not the best of places to live, but it's by far unlivable. And what else does she expect on such a short notice anyway? She's been in Ellijay for 3 weeks now. She has done nothing but whine about her home and yet hasn't even begun to look for another place. We have given her newspapers, shown her online how to look up places around us etc....But she would rather my husband do it for her. And sorry NO....he and I have our own lives and she is a grown ass woman! Well her landlord had offered for her to look at another place that he was currently evicting some tennants from. All he needed to do was get the paper work legalizing the removal of their belongings and he would have moved them out ASAP (this was Monday) so he called my husband and told him that. Which on Monday when we picked her up to take her to our home to do laundry he relayed this message to her. At that point she began her 2 year old temper tantrum. Crying and whining etc.... I, like usual, bit my tounge and didn't say two words to her. Which isn't unusual since I really didn't care for the woman to start with. She asked for me to take her to the post office to get her package and then to take her home. I wasn't one to plead and beg for her to come to our house to do her laundry. I respected her wishes and took her home. But on the way back to her house she asked me to stop at a gas station, where she promptly bought some beer (a 30 pack) Tate stated to her that "he was sorry he moved her up here because she was so unhappy" (Mind you that is ALL he said to her) and we dropped her off. By the time we got home she had bashed us all over Facebook telling anyone who would listen that we said we wished we had never moved her up here, and that she was to much trouble for us and all sorts of other nonsense. Then she proceed to message my mother on facebook and call her all sorts of names (the attack wasn't warranted and I had read the posts, my mom never said a thing to her!) Then proceeded to call our cell for the next 10 hours straight stating things like I was a whore and that my husband was an asshole and that we were the whitest of white trash....these voicemails are all saved on our phone as well. She proceeded to insult and threaten her neighbors and bug the landlord and other things. Which has gotten the police called on her, and the landlord letting her know that he wants her out on her ass and that he is giving her the rent money back ASAP. Which I don't blame him one bit after the trouble that she caused him all day and us for that matter. But now that it's 3 days later she is calling our phone and "apologizing and crying" and wanting my husband to call her. But I'm at my end with this woman. I've had enough of her childish behavior and I'm not going to stand for it. I know and knew that Tate will forgive her, he's her son and the only real reliable family she has. I don't hold it against him when he wants to make amends with her. But I'm not really the forgiving type, so it's going to be a while before I forgive and forget. If I ever do. With me you only get one shot, and she used that up! So I guess the question I forgive and forget because she is my husbands mother? I mean yea he can forgive her all he wants. But I'm the only one that can drive, so he can't go see or help her unless I'm the one to take him out there. And I'll be damned if it's going to be anytime soon. What do you think?
Later Taters
p.s. this post really doesn't FULLY express how I feel or how much really happened that day...

Wednesday, November 3, 2010

When I found her.............

She has been a missing part of my life for almost 14 years. I haven't seen her, spoken to her, hugged her or anything. Everyday I think about her. Wonder what type of young woman she has grown up to be. Where she is, is she happy etc. So when I finally found her online, on facebook, it was a happy day. But also a day filled with emotion. Would she talk to me, would she want me part of her life? I got my answer loud and clear. No. She doesn't want anything to do with me. She blocked me and has refused to acknowledge my existance. And it saddens me to say the least.
And if you are confused, I'm talking about my youngest sister.
She and I both went through a rough trial in our lives. We didn't have the best of childhoods growing up. Being put in different foster homes, being bounced around etc. I'm 7 years older so went through it a lot worse than she did. But she got lucky. She found a woman that loved her and adopted her. I stepped aside and let her grow up, let her deal with her traumas and always offered any answers I could provide. We did talk a little via email when she was growing up. But then it all stopped, and I didn't push. I just let her grow. I've never stopped thinking about her. She is my little sister afterall. And I was like a mother to her. I took care of her, fed her, bathed her, etc. So yea in a way I felt like a mother to her. So to find her on facebook and to write her was hard. I was excited, sad, happy etc. It was like a whole new life and world was going to open up to me. Finally I'd have my little sister back in my life. I was excited. But my oh so loving husband sort of told me "not to get my hopes up" when I told him the whole story. He's been supportive about it all and has helped me to understand a few things.
Everyone handles trauma differently. I guess I was just so use to it all that I've hardened myself. Whereas (according to her adoptive mom) it took her years of counseling and such to come to terms. And to her "I'm a reminder of a sad time in her life"
Which is kind of like a slap in the face and a let down. I had my hope set on her and I connecting and having some symbolizing sister hood again. But alas that is not to be. So I guess I should give up and live my life and forget about connection with her. I wish her the best and I'm sad that she is the kind of person who would shut the only blood family she has left. But I wish her the best of luck in everything she persues.
Later Taters,